how to not spend money
a poorly written financial guide
Something my friends often ask me is how I refrain from spending money. Most of the times, I give unhelpful answers because I’m caught off guard, so I finally dedicated a whole post to it.
To be honest, I don’t think I’m amazing at budgeting; my credit card statements these last two months have been looking dire but those are the joys of NYC. Some of my guy friends probably think it’s laughable that I am writing this, because I definitely spend ten times more than them, but everything is relative, and they can write a “how to not spend money” that blows mine out of the water if they wanted to.
I was raised to be incredibly frugal as most immigrant Asian children are. As a teen, I perused clearance aisles and refused to buy anything that wasn’t on sale. Back then, I would buy things because they were on sale. Ugly $4 shirt? I thought I could make it work. Spoiler: You can’t.
I’ve noticed that kids who grow up in super frugal families diverge into two paths: they either carry the torch of frugality or succumb to shopaholic tendencies. There’s like no in-between, and I guess I have landed in the camp of carrying the torch of frugality which makes me qualified to write this post.
To be quite honest with you all, I think I was just born less materialistic? Is that a thing? My parents told me that I was pretty uninterested in things as a child. They would buy me toys, and I was pretty uninterested in all of them. I mostly enjoyed writing, and I now have heaps of journals spanning from kindergarten to present day, which I suppose is why I now spend my free time writing on Substack instead of…buying things? So, this is just a disclaimer that a lot of my frugal habits come simply from the fact that I am uninterested in many things.
At the risk of sounding like one of those cringey financial literacy bros, frugality, at its heart, is more of a mindset than a series of actions. As a concept, I think the importance of frugality spans far beyond simply saving money. For me, I don’t want to succumb to consumerism, because I don’t want to spend my life wanting things; that doesn’t sound fun. Ultimately, you can follow a bunch of budgeting tips and feel incredibly limited and yearny if you still just want everything, so most of these tips I have are mindset shifts but I’ve sprinkled in some practical advice as well.
EVERYTHING is an investment.
I think of almost everything I buy as an investment. It doesn’t matter if it cost me $5 or if it cost me hundreds, it is an investment. Even if it’s not monetary sink, it’s going to be taking up space in my room, my closet, my bag, and I’m going to have to look at it from time-to-time. I absolutely loathe owning things that don’t bring me joy and/or utility. I’m no Marie Kondo, but I do feel that having too many things feels quite suffocating.
Additionally, I fear buyer’s regret more I love shopping. We could end it here, because ultimately, the secret to how you stop buying is to be so scared of buyer’s regret that you just don’t buy, period.
THINK OF THE CHILDREN.
I don’t even like kids, but whenever I think about buying a piece of clothing, I think about the clothing landfills that are piling up in third-world countries, and I imagine little children drowning in the masses of Shein. I’m not sure why I imagine specifically children because textile landfills affect everyone, but I suppose children paint a more poignant image. It doesn’t matter where I get it from, the thrift store, some sustainable brand, it doesn’t matter. Because one day, it’s going to end up in some landfill and I will have contributed to increasing the demand for said item. This advice should be even more effective for those of you who like kids.
Wait.
This is absolutely the most generic budgeting tip that you will get from anyone, but it’s incredibly effective. If I see something I like, I’ll bookmark it or write it down in my notes app and give myself at least two months, sometimes six months to really contemplate the purchase, and 90% of the time, after that period, I no longer want it.
Ask yourself hella questions before buying anything.
I get it, sometimes, you don’t have two months to think about an item. Maybe you’re at a thrift store or the “running low on stock” message is on your screen and you’re like shit, it’s now or never. Still, it’s important to spend just five minutes vetting the product. For clothing, here are some of the things I think about:
How does the piece need to be washed/taken care of? I will absolutely not be dry cleaning anything.
What material is it? It’s 2024, we don’t need to be wearing polyester everything unless it’s sweat-wicking or going to structure cute pleats.
How often am I going to wear it?
Does it go with things that are already in my closet?
Can I return it easily? I’m not paying $15 to return something.
What brand is it?
Have a pre-determined list of things you want.
I have a running list of things I’m looking to buy that lives somewhere in my mind palace. Right now, I’m looking for loose off-the-shoulder sweaters, cute flats/low-heels, a floor lamp with an interesting shade, athletic wear, home fragrance, NYRB classics, casual sneakers, hair protectant. I tend not deviate off that list; if it’s not on the list, it’s not that important.
How are you going to get rid of it?
This is another question I ask myself when purchasing, but I think it’s one of the most important ones. Not everything I buy is going to stand the test of time, and that’s fine. There was a brief period in my life when I was an Aritzia girl, and when I woke up from that delusion, it was all okay, because Aritzia sells on Depop really easily. So ask yourself how easily you can get rid of whatever you buy. It doesn’t have to be clothes. If it’s furniture, can I list it on Facebook Marketplace? Is it easy to dissemble or would I have to hire something to get rid of it?
Take advantage of credit card offers.
If you’re going to spend money, at least see if you can get cashback! If I’m shopping at any recognizable brand, I check my AMEX, Chase, and Paypal offers. You can also use specific cashback websites like Rakuten.
I feel like a silly Wattpad writer, adding on a silly little life update, but as some of you may or may not have noticed, I did not post last week.
FAQ:
What happened?? Why didn’t you post?
Nothing happened. I simply was head empty, and while I’m not a perfectionist when it comes to writing, I’m not going to put out absolute dogshit to keep a streak going. I’m quite proud of myself for posting 38 weeks in a row, but alas, I knew that there would come a day when I have no desire to write, and that so happened to be last week.
reading this the morning after a regrettable amazon spree…i needed this
This was actually so helpful because I went the shopaholic way 😔 i will think of the children!!!!!